


There comeing to take me away

by siramay



Category: Original Work, napoleon xiv
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-16
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:28:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 4,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26495665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/siramay/pseuds/siramay
Summary: a story of insanity and napoleon xiv song lyricshttps://youtu.be/1x88EUR9VKc
Kudos: 1





	1. There Comeing To Take Me Away

**Author's Note:**

> i do not own these songs they where made by jerry samuals aka napoleon xiv

[GABRIEL PATTEN]  
Remember when you ran away  
And I got on my knees  
And begged you not to leave  
Because I'd go berserk  
Well, you left me anyhow  
And then the days got worse and worse  
And now you see I've gone  
Completely out of my mind

And, they're coming to take me away ha-ha  
They're coming to take me away ho ho hee hee ha ha  
To the funny farm  
Where life is beautiful all the time  
And I'll be happy to see those nice young men  
In their clean white coats  
And they're coming to take me away ha ha

You thought it was a joke  
And so you laughed  
You laughed when I had said  
That losing you would make me flip my lid  
Right? You know you laughed  
I heard you laugh, you laughed  
You laughed and laughed and then you left  
But now you know I'm utterly mad

And, they're coming to take me away ha ha  
They're coming to take me away ho ho hee hee ha ha  
To the happy home with trees and flowers and chirping birds  
And basket weavers who sit and smile and twiddle their thumbs and toes  
And they're coming to take me away ha ha

I cooked your food  
I cleaned your house  
And this is how you pay me back  
For all my kind unselfish, loving deeds?  
Huh? Well you just wait  
They'll find you yet  
And when they do they'll put you in  
The A.S.P.C.A., you mangy mutt!

And, they're coming to take me away ha ha  
They're coming to take me away ho ho hee hee ha ha  
To the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time  
And I'll be happy to see those nice young men  
In their clean white coats  
And they're coming to take me away ha ha!  
To the happy home with trees and flowers and chirping birds  
And basket weavers who sit and smile and twiddle their thumbs and toes  
And they're coming to take me away ha ha!  
To the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time  
And I'll be happy to see those nice young men in their clean white coats...


	2. ode to a letsplayer

[GABRIEL PATTEN]  
As they walked down the lane together  
The moon was shining above  
Her heart was as light as a feather  
And her green eyes glowed with love  
As his arm stole around… her shoulder  
Words couldn’t come some how  
For he was only a lets player  
And she was a in game girl!  
Hey! hehehhe


	3. the explorer

**Gabriel walks into a bathroom and starts breathing as the setting changes to a different man exploring the jungle**

[THE EXPLORER]  
Whew   
Its getting dark  
I hope I find my way back to camp before sunset  
Id be afraid to be out here alone at night in this jungle paradise

**But then we hear chanting woman**

Uh oh what was that?  
Who the heck could that be  
 **the chanting gets louder and then**  
Whats that? Whos there  
Oh no!  
Oh Oh god no ladies  
Oh my god oh don’t do that  
Oh your ripping the clothes  
Oh no don’t do that   
Oh my MMMMMMM  
Mmmmm don’t do that   
OooOoOoOoOoMMMMMMM OOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
Oh your hurting oouu your hurting ahhhh  
Oh no ah   
Ahh noo no  
Oh no oooo nonononono   
nononoon  
oh no ooooo no  
daaaahh mmmm ooo aaaaaaahhh  
AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH DON’T

**BANG BANG BANG**

[ALL]  
What was that noise!

**a loud knocking on the door**

[WOMAN]  
You still in there?  
What the heck are you doing in there so long

[GABRIEL]  
Uh! What do you think im doing?  
 **he says as he flushes he toilet adjust his clothes and exists the bathroom**  
Just using the bathroom is all…


	4. im in love with my little red tricycle

[GABRIEL PATTEN]  
Thirty days have Septober  
April, June and Nowonder  
All the rest have peanut butter  
All except my dear grandmother

She had a little red tricycle  
I stole it hahahaha

I am in love with my little red tricycle  
It has pedals, and a seat that has springs  
And wheels that have spokes  
That don't speak 'til they're spoken to  
And a little bell that I can ring  
See? See?

Thirty days have Septober  
April, June and Nowonder  
All the rest have peanut butter  
All except my dear grandmother

She had a little red tricycle  
It's mine now hahahahahaha

When I am riding my little red tricycle  
Why do people always stop and ask me  
"Why must you ride on that little red tricycle  
At your age, you know you're forty-three?"

I didn't really steal the tricycle from my grandmother  
It followed me home  
ha-hah


	5. Photogenic, Schizophrenic You

[GABRIEL PATTEN]  
This change in me  
What can it be? Is it really true?  
If the answer is "yes", then I confess  
Here's who I owe it to:

Photogenic, Schizophrenic you  
With your golden hair askew  
I drool about your dual personality  
’Cause I know that both of them are mad for me  
Photogenic, Schizophrenic you

Photogenic, Schizophrenic you  
Though your every mood is blue  
You have gazed at no one else, I swear  
You have told me by your vacant stare  
And my name on your tattoo

Photogenic, Schizophrenic you  
With your thirty-six I.Q  
Is everybody crazy?  
Your tender kisses give me just as many thrills  
As if I took twenty tranquilizer pills  
Photogenic, Schizophrenic you

You have gained so very much renown  
In your strapless hospital gown  
Oh, I will spoon with you through all my life  
'Cause they won't let me have a fork or knife  
Photogenic, Schizophrenic you  
And your new tattoo  
Ooh!


	6. Marching off to bedlam

[GABRIEL PATTEN]  
One, two, three!  
Here we go!  
Bedlam, bedlam!  
Ho, ho, ho!

 **sung in background all the way through** :   
Ring ding ding, rum bum bum, riki tiki daba daba dum bum bum

[GABRIEL]  
Knock, knock, knock!  
Come right in!  
You're the people from the looney bin!

How'd you guys get here so soon?  
Did you spot my toy balloon?

Please don't make the straps too snug  
I've always been a fragile bug

Must we march?  
Can't we ride?  
I've got my horse parked right outside

Glad to see that we're on time  
But must you always speak in rhyme?

Lock the door and hide the key  
'Cause if I get loose, you won't catch me  
 **panting from ring ding dinger**


	7. doing the showgun dragon

[GABRIEL PATTEN]  
Act like A showgun dragon and you will see  
You can be anything you want to be  
Stand real tall and look your best  
Place your hand inside your vest  
Havin' fun, doin' the A showgun dragon

Actin' like A showgun dragon  
Jerkin' like A showgun dragon  
Struttin' like A showgun dragon  
Laughin' like A showgun dragon

Jerk like A showgun dragon and you'll agree  
It's kind of nutty, it will set you free  
Watch your inhibitions go  
Think real big, your world will grow  
Havin' fun, doin' the A showgun dragon

Actin' like A showgun dragon  
Jerkin' like A showgun dragon  
Struttin' like A showgun dragon  
Laughin' like A showgun dragon

Strut like A showgun dragon 'cause that's the key  
And maybe you'll go down in history  
Doesn't matter what comes next  
You won't need your deus ex  
Havin' fun, doin' the A showgun dragon

Actin' like A showgun dragon  
Jerkin' like A showgun dragon  
Struttin' like A showgun dragon  
Laughin' like A showgun dragon  
Hahahah  
Hahahahahah!  
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH  
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!


	8. I live in a place where the nuts hunt the Squirrels

[GABRIEL PATTEN]  
I live in a place where the nuts hunt the squirrels  
In a place where the nuts hunt the squirrels, haha  
It's a beautiful spot where I don't think a lot  
And mostly I don't think of girls like you, hoo ha  
I don't think of girls like you!

When I think of the traffic, and horns  
And lights that flash and signs that blink  
And say don't walk and subways that roar  
And brakes that screech  
And noisy men drilling holes in the streets!

I'm mad for that place where the nuts hunt the squirrels  
Where the people all smile and I play, haha  
And I spend all my time skipping rocks at the ducks  
And I don't think of girls like you, hoo ha  
I don't think of girls like you!

You drove me to this and you know that you did  
To the place where the nuts hunt the squirrels, haha  
But I couldn't care less 'cause my life was a mess  
So who needs the human race, haha  
I don't need the human race!

[GUILTY PLEASURE]  
I don't have any use for girls like you  
Who tell me what I should say and do  
And how I should cut my hair  
And shave my shoes and shine my face  
I live like a nut in the human race!

So I'm mad for this place where the nuts hunt the squirrels  
And it's here I shall always remain, haha  
It's here I shall always remain  
But there's just one complaint I've had so far  
They're trying to drive me sane, hee hee  
They're trying to drive me sane, ho ho  
They're trying to drive me sane, haha  
They're trying to drive me sane, hee hee  
They're trying to drive me sane, ho ho  
They're trying to drive me sane, haha  
They're trying to drive me sane, hee hee  
They're trying to drive me sane!


	9. Lets cuddle up In my security blanket

[GUILTY PLEASURE]  
What’s wrong, my pet?  
You seem so upset  
Tell me what’s bothering you  
You’re acting strange  
It’s time for a change  
Let me suggest what to do:

Let’s cuddle up  
In my security blanket  
And there we can hide  
From the world  
Why should we care  
If others conform?

we’ll snuggle up  
So cozy and warm

Oh, we will be safe  
When we’re wrapped up  
In the blanket  
Well see all our problems  
Unfurl  
So let’s cuddle up  
In my security blanket  
And there we can hide  
From the world


	10. Goofin on the job

[GABRIEL]  
Hey! Hey! She's gone away!  
Goodbye and good riddance to her, hooray! hooray! hooray!  
And I'm sitting in the office  
Goofing on the job, just  
Throwing little darts at her photograph  
Hanging on the wall

Hey, what the hell is it?  
I always miss  
I haven't hit it yet  
So, what? And why am I upset?  
Perhaps I need to get... new... darts  
Of course  
It's all  
I put them in the jar  
And now I think I'm feeling better than before!  
Oh boy! It's just a toy  
And I best begin to work or I'll be unemployed  
'Cause I'm sitting in the office  
Goofing on the job, just  
Thumbing up my nose at her photograph  
Hanging on the wall

Oh, I'm so sorry  
I didn't mean to do that sort of thing  
Oh no! How can I make it up?  
Perhaps, if only this, a kiss  
Okay? Relax. I'll kiss the photograph  
And just to think I've almost ripped the thing in half

Oh, gee, what's wrong with me?  
I best put the picture away before I blow my tree  
'Cause I'm sitting in the office  
Goofing on the job, just  
Shouting dirty words at her photograph

What? It isn't there...  
It never was  
There is no photograph  
It's just the window  
Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!  
AAAAHHHHH

**and then he falls off the building as he crashes on the ground**

[PEOPLE]  
_the sounds of car comeing to a halt_  
OH MY GOD SOMEBODY FELL OUT!  
hey somebody fell out!  
hey somboody fell out

**he's still alive**


	11. Bats in my belfry

[GP]  
Bats in my belfry and rain on my roof  
Even my teddy bear stays so aloof  
Flies that go walking on leashes so long  
Even my parakeet wears a sarong  
Sometimes I wonder, but mostly I don't  
I always say yes but usually I won't  
Elephants flying way off to the moon  
Even my sundial's stuck at high noon

Signs that say quiet and yo-yos on strings  
Ride on the carousel‚ grab the brass rings  
Aches that I feel on my window pane  
Rolled-up umbrellas are out in the rain  
Boxes that herald Please stand in a line  
Tarzans are riding on the 6:20 vine  
Mostly I end up with egg on my face  
I can't keep the bulbs lit in my fireplace

Bats in my belfry‚ polars are bear  
Polish the cannon in the town square  
We'll all take a ride on my new pogo stick  
Here comes the night nurse! Cover up‚ quick!  
Thoughts that need thinking like spring has been sprung  
Fantasy helps all of us to think young  
Everyone knows that penguins go formal  
So who's there among us to say who is normal?


	12. Dr. Psyche, the Cut-Rate Head-Shrinker

[GP]  
In a shabby little office  
On a shabby little street  
Sits a shabby little doctor  
In his shabby little seat  
Every shabby little secret  
How he sure loves to betray  
He will give you shabby treatment  
Every night and every day

Doctor Psyche the cut-rate head shrinker  
On mixed-up heads he likes to tinker  
I only see him when my brain starts to snap  
This slouch has no couch, I hang onto a strap  
He never got his PhD  
In book-learning he really lacks  
He ducked all his classes in psychiatry  
Now he's known as the king of the quacks

Doctor Psyche the cut-rate head shrinker  
On mixed-up heads he likes to tinker  
And though by my stories he's seldom impressed  
He's helped many women get things off their chest  
He never got his PhD  
His mind has been so hard to reach  
His Freudian textbooks are something to see  
With trading stamps pasted in each

Doctor Psyche the cut-rate head shrinker  
On mixed-up heads he likes to tinker  
I learned that his technique is oh so refined  
From all my fixations he helps me unwind  
And he tells me quite gravely it's all in my mind  
Doctor Psyche the cut-rate head shrinker


	13. I live in a split-level head

I've lived in apartments  
I've lived in a home  
I've traveled in trailors  
When I used to roam  
But now in these places  
You won't catch me dead  
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split level head

I do what I want to  
No worries, no cares  
If anyone bugs me  
I'll climb level stairs  
Way up to a level  
Where astronauts bed  
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split level head

In here time means nothing  
I coulden't care less  
I don't run for buses  
And trains are a mess  
There's no one to care for  
I don't make a bed  
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split level head

I like how I'm living  
I'm nobody's slave  
My head's above water  
So don't make a wave  
There's no door to lock  
And no door to be fed  
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split level head

So why should I move  
When the neighborhood's right  
No taxes to pay  
And no landlord to fight  
Now I call this living  
Once more as I said  
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split level head

Now you keep your old turf  
Your hills and what's new  
You sure coulden't have them  
And live like I do  
You think I have problems  
But you do instead  
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split level head

I live with two people  
I like most of them  
He likes most of me  
And I like most of him  
Their my alter egos  
And to them I'm wed  
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split level head

There's no simple status  
In my neighbohood  
It's that kind of thinking  
That keeps it so good  
I don't take the lead  
But I like to be led  
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split level head


	14. Im happy they took you away

[LOREN]  
Remember when I ran away  
And you got on your knees  
And begged me not to leave  
Because you'd go berserk?  
Well...

You thought you had me fooled  
But I just left you anyhow  
Because I knew you were  
Already out of your mind!  
And...

I'm happy they took you away, haha  
I'm happy they took you away, ho ho, hee hee, ha ha  
To the funny farm  
Where life's hysterical all the time  
And you'll be sorry I sent  
Those nice, young men  
In their clean, white coats  
And I'm happy they took you away, ha-ha!

I thought that you were nuts  
And so I laughed  
I laughed when you had said  
That losing me would make you flip your lid  
Right...

It's true, I laughed, you heard me laugh  
I laughed, I laughed and laughed  
And then I left  
Because I know you're utterly mad  
And...

I'm happy they took you away, haha  
I'm happy they took you away, ho ho, hee hee, ha ha  
To the happy home  
With tree and flowers and chirping birds  
And basket weavers who sit and smile  
And twiddle their thumbs and toes  
And I'm happy they took you away, ha-ha!

You burned my food  
You wrecked my house  
And this is how I've paid you back  
For all your cruel, unloving selfish deeds!  
Huh...

They've got you now  
And you'll get just  
What you deserve  
For calling me a mutt, you mangy man!  
And...

I'm happy they took you away, haha  
I'm happy they took you away, ho ho, hee hee, ha ha  
To the funny farm  
Where life's hysterical all the time  
And you'll be sorry I sent  
Those nice, young men  
In their clean, white coats  
And I'm happy they took you away, ha-ha!

To the happy home  
With trees and flowers and chirping birds  
And basket weavers who sit and smile  
And twiddle their thumbs and toes  
And I'm happy they took you away, ha-ha!  
  
[GP]  
...

And they where never heard from again


	15. The nuts on my family tree

[GP]  
I flip every time I take a look  
At the pictures inside my family tree

I take off my hat and burst with pride  
When I recall all the things they tried  
Their classic bits made such history  
The nuts on my family tree

The first stood his ground with humans to  
And it was such a foolish thing to do  
He was powerless, but he wasn't done  
So I ask you, what had he done?

The next nut was sure a lot of one  
He was there in the boat with Saturn Cawthon  
When a sin in the man filled all with clout  
He sent them down to sort things out

I take off my hat and burst with pride  
When I recall all the things they tried  
Their classic bits made such history  
The nuts on my family tree

The next got the word from satoshi goatah  
But he stayed just to have that one last beer  
So the word he was just to drunk to stay  
so he got banished to space

The one who, of course had took a stand  
I'm now going to give a great, big hand  
But the hand that he gets should be in the mouth  
'Cause he accidently dropped his child down

I take off my hat and burst with pride  
When I recall the things they tried  
Their classic bits made such history  
The nuts on my family tree

4, 5, 9, 2, 7, 3, 4!


	16. I owe a lot to Iowa pot

[GP]  
Oh, I owe a lot to Iowa pot, Iowa grown and bred  
I never knew such beautiful boo  
Grew in this groovy land I'm in, and I'm in-  
Debted indeed to Iowa weed, Iowa bred and born, O  
I owe a lot to Iowa pot, and that's not just Iowa corn

Contraband in the land of mañana is so ruthlessly reckless to cop  
But those Iowans cop what they wanna, standing on a marijuana crop  
And it grows in that midwestern section  
And there isn't a glimmer of doubt  
It would shake a Jamaica connection  
'Cause it's cheap, deep, and far fleeping out

Oh, I owe a lot to Iowa pot, Iowa grown and bred  
I never knew such beautiful boo  
Grew in this groovy land I'm in, and I'm in-  
Debted indeed to Iowa weed, Iowa bred and born, O  
I owe a lot to Iowa pot, and that's not just Iowa corn

Well, I never did care for domestic. I was always turning it down  
But I just smoked a joint so majestic, so fentestic, it's the best stick in town  
So you keep your Colombian rip-off, and your shady Canadian scene  
For I'd rather be singeing my lip off  
On some neat, sweet, Iowa green

Oh, I owe a lot to Iowa pot, Iowa grown and bred  
I never knew such beautiful boo  
Grew in this groovy land I'm in, and I'm in-  
Debted indeed to Iowa weed, Iowa bred and born, O  
I owe a lot to Iowa pot, and that's not just Iowa corn


	17. can you dig it?

[GP]  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?

Now I love me  
And you love me  
And you love you  
And I love you  
And I love him  
And you love him  
And he loves you  
And he loves me  
And I love her  
And you love her  
And she loves you  
And she loves me

Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?

Now he loves her  
And she loves her  
And she loves him  
And he loves him  
And I love them  
And you love them  
And they love you  
And they love me  
And they love him  
And they love her  
And she loves them  
And he loves them

Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?

Now he loves us  
And she loves us  
And we love her  
And we love him  
And we love you  
And we love me  
And I love us  
And you love us  
And they love us  
And they love them  
And we love them  
And we love us!

Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it?  
Can you dig it? Yeah  
Can you dig it? Yeah  
Can you dig it? Yeah  
Can you dig it? Yeah!  
Can you dig it? Yeah!  
Can you dig it? Yeah!  
Can you dig it? Yeah!  
Can you dig it? Yeah!


	18. The song I wrote for Mathew Yeager

[GP]  
I would like to play the song I wrote for Mathew Yaeger   
Uh Mr. Yaeger never sung the song oh nononono  
But never the less it’s still the song I wrote for Mathew Yaeger  
darling how I love you   
In each and every way  
But I love you most of all  
For your feminine hygiene deodorant spray

How id hate to lose you  
If even for a day  
But I’ll lose you if you run-  
Out of feminine hygiene deodorant spray

With joy and jubilation  
I will bless you endlessly  
For your kind consideration  
In the way you smell for me

So say you’ll use it always  
And always I will stay  
Snuggled warmly in your arms  
And your feminine hygiene deodorant spray

Thank you


	19. There coming to get me again

[GP]  
Remember when they took me  
To the funny farm  
For acting like a lunatic  
Because you ran away?  
Hah?

Well that was many years ago  
And now at last they've let me out  
I've finally made them think  
I'm perfectly sane  
But...

They're coming to get me again, haha  
They're coming to take me away again, hee hee, ho ho  
To the loony bin  
Where life was ludicrous all the time  
And I'm just crazy about  
Those big strong goons  
With their clean white necks  
'Cause they're coming to get me again, haha!

I thought you were my friend  
And so I trusted you  
Believed in you  
The day you swore you'd always be my pet  
But...

I trusted you, you know I did  
I did, I really did  
But then you hit  
And I'm not really totally cured  
So...

They're coming to get me again, haha  
They're coming to put me away again, hoo hoo, hey hey  
In a rubber room  
With fleas and cowards and burping nerds  
And pimple poppers who sweat and sneer  
And squiggle and squeeze and squirt  
And they're coming to get me again, haha!

I scrubbed your toes  
I cleaned your cage  
But all you ever did was pay me back  
With cruel unloving selfish deeds  
Yes...

Well now I'm free  
So just wait  
I'll find you soon  
And when I do I'll swing you by your tail you hairy ape!  
And...

They're coming to get me again, haha  
They're coming to take me away again, hee hee, ho ho  
To the loony bin  
Where life was ludicrous all the time  
And I'm just crazy about  
Those big strong goons  
With their clean white necks  
'Cause they're coming to get me again, haha!

To the rubber room  
With fleas and cowards and burping nerds  
And pimple poppers who sweat and sneer  
And squiggle and squeeze and squirt  
And they're coming to get me again, haha!

To the loony bin  
Where life was ludicrous all the time  
And I'm just crazy about  
Those big strong goons  
With their clean white necks  
'Cause they're coming to get me again, haha!

To the happy home  
With trees and flowers and chirping birds  
And basket weavers...

To the funny farm  
Where life was beautiful all the time  
And I'll be happy...

Oh no!


	20. It may appear ridiculous

[GP]  
It may appear ridiculous   
That I am so meticulous   
But dirt and filth and germs I am a spars with  
So im sure you’ll understand  
Should you offer me your hand  
Please not the hand you wipe your arse with

_and then i ran i ran for my dear life cause i knew i would die otherwise  
as i saw the docks and wondered... japan or Australia _   
_both lands of crazy people but on different levels unlike Florida_   
_but japan has anime witch is entertaining_   
_so i hoped on the boat_   
_oh boy i didn't realize what i just put myself up for_


End file.
